Comput-her-Man-Marries-Machine

ACLU Sues, Defends Mans Right To Marry “Comput-Her”

January 22, 2064 – Associated Press - Image Credit

NEW YORK CITY — The American Civil Liberties Union has sued the state of New York over the issue of digital marriage rights, saying the official decision to refuse benefits to a man trying to marry his home built “comput-her” is a violation of his rights as a citizen of the new United Americas.

The Lawsuit filed Tuesday says the state has put hundreds of couples in virtual limbo as they wait for the case to go through the appeals process.

“This decision is just devastating.” said one hopeful bystander, “We were all eagerly waiting to move forward with our engagements, but now we have to wait even longer. It’s just not right!”.

There is a press conference scheduled this afternoon where the ACLU will discuss the lawsuit filed on behalf of J. Erkoff and his digital debutante.

New York Gov. Jason Grestaki did not respond to numerous voicemails left at his state house office.

More than 1,500 couples, all across New York, have filed for provisional digital marriage certificates in preparation for what they thought would be a “landmark victory” today in court.

Peter P. from upstate New York told Raymmar.com: “We are extremely disappointed. We had hoped to get married online in a few months and it looks like we will have to postpone our wedding, yet again”.

The state made it clear that it would automatically extend the expiration date on the provisional digital marriage certificates, but would not recognize them as “official” until the legal process has a chance to “play out in court”.

A spokesperson for the court stated that “The validity of any other pre-existing marriage certificates will ultimately be decided by the 2nd Circuit Court of Appeals.”, which is waiting on the proper paperwork in order to process the appeal.

“I just want to move on with my life.”, said Erkoff as he left the court. ”This is not a new issue and it is about time the courts recognized these marriages as legal.”

The controversy over digital relationships started shortly after the movie “Her” was released back in December of 2013. Highlighting the life of a lonely writer who fell in love with his operating system, the movie was a harbinger of things to come.

Over the last 50 years we have seen the romantic lines between humans and computers dissolve. The issue has made news recently because of the proliferation of artificial intelligence, and the fact that humanoid machinery has become a larger part of our every day lives.

These digital assistants, which first entered our houses as nannies, maids and personal chefs, have crossed the line from convenience to controversy in recent years. There have even been reports of ruined marriages due to affairs with machines.

“It’s just filthy and unnatural; God will surely punish the wicked” said one opponent to the digital marriage act. “First them gays got married, and now this; What the hell is this world coming to?”.

Some, such as singer/songwriter and influential pop icon, Phem Enisst are taking a completely different stand on the issue. She recently posted this message on her Instawall:

“We should be so lucky as to have men marry machines, we’d no longer have to be slaves to the male species and that is defs a world I could live in.” #MachineSex #DMequality.

In the last 50 years the ACLU has made considerable progress in the fight to defend individual liberties. “We will continue to fight against this injustice until the courts rule in our favor.” said Steve Ignant, legal director of the ACLU in New York. “We will take this all the way to the Supreme Court if we have to!”.

“This is just one of a number of lawsuits we will be spearheading across 5 different states in defense of the digital marriage act.”, Ignant told me as he walked away, “There are currently only 5 (states) that recognize provisional certificates, and that’s just not good enough. We will win… we are going to win this battle… you’ll see; we always win.”.

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