An inside source has leaked internal documents from the city that reveals alternative proposals for the Sarasota Quay property in downtown Sarasota.
This article was originally published on Sarasota Day
After reviewing the documents…
we can only assume the six proposals are being seriously considered by the City Commission as viable options. And although the staff at sarasotaday.com remain uncertain as to the identity of the whistleblower, our source revealed that each proposal could have links with local organizations
Until these leaked documents were presented to SarasotaDay.com, the only other legitimate proposal announced to the public to date had been by GreenPointe Holdings LLC of Jacksonville whose intention is to build numerous high-rise buildings on the property.
Trust us, we will be covering this potentially ground-breaking story as it unfolds at #CityLeaks.
Proposal #1: “Unconditional Surrender”
Due to the constant debate over the location of “Unconditional Surrender”, it appears a local organization is proposing to have the sculpture moved permanently to the Quay Property. This, of course, would allow more space for tourists and visitors alike to admire the statuesque conversation piece.
Proposal #2: Super Walmart
Due to last year’s denial of Walmart’s desire to build a store on Ringling Boulevard, it appears the Arkansas-based retailer has rethought their original proposal and now intends to submit plans to build a new Super-center atop the Quay Property.
We reached out to Walmart for confirmation of the proposal, but a company spokesperson declined to comment. However, an anonymous source with knowledge of the negotiations did make contact stating Walmart believes the Quay Property would be “ideal for great savings and rollback prices.”
Proposal #3: Parking Garage.
The parking garage proposal seemed to be the most ambitious and potentially best use for the property. According to experts, revenue from parking and parking meters could shunt millions of dollars into the City’s coffers.
Proposal #4: Rowing Facility.
This proposal appeared to mirror the current rowing facility in Lakewood Ranch. We can only assume the City Commission is seriously considering digging a large hole and filling it with water as a way to ensure Sarasota can compete for business and tourism with East County.
Proposal #5: Piano Park.
The recent proposals being reviewed by the City of Sarasota to place pianos downtown to encourage more vibrant activity have apparently spread to the Quay Property. It’s unclear how many pianos will fit on the property, but after talking with a City Development consultant, he predicted that upwards of 3,000 pianos could be comfortably accommodated resulting in a mellifluous by-product of tourism.
Proposal #6: Tube Dude Memorial.
This final proposal came as no surprise to the staff at Sarasotaday.com
Let’s face the fact: everyone loves Tube Dude. It has proven to be one of the City’s main drivers of tourism. The proposal shows a larger rendition of Tube Dude which will allegedly scale over 500 feet in height. This would be the largest Tube Dude known to man, and experts predict it will be visible from Longboat Key.
As this story continues to develop, SarasotaDay.com will make sure to keep you abreast of events behind the closed doors at City Hall.
#CityLeaks.
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What a total load of BS.
You assume that we actually have control over our lives.
The society under which we lives robs most of us of the autonomy required to succeed.
There are no winners without losers.
If you have “won”, it means somebody else has lost.
“Success” is an illusion.
Is this article a joke?
I think satire might be a more appropriate description but yes. It was written as a joke.